"The Butterfly Wall"

These two years have been different for me as it would have been for most people, because of COVID-19. I have been one of the luckiest few. I stopped working as a research scientist and started prioritising living where climbing is accessible. It is a blessing to be able to not work and do what I enjoy the most. For me, sport climbing does not come naturally and I have crippling fears when I tie into the rope. I prefer top roping to leading most of the times. After moving to Nowra in July, I spent a few weeks top-roping to get me less scared of being high up. I witnessed some of my best friends doing some courageous projects and finally decided to take up the climb “Butterfly Wall” as my first project of the season.

The Butterfly Wall is an iconic line up a slightly overhanging face at Thompsons Point. It climbs up a beautiful yellow streak with a unique butterfly-shaped flake up the middle of the face. The climb for me has three distinct cruxes. The first crux involves a sharp crimp, a slopey undercling and a powerful high step. The second crux is technical with intricate foot work and a big lockoff. The final crux involves matching and trusting a slopey edge. I worked out the second and third cruxes after two sessions but the first crux was burley and felt impossible.

I decided to do a painting of the route when I was warming up on Vandaholics (the route opposing the Butterfly Wall). As I was being lowered off the warmup, I looked back on the Butterfly Wall and I was amazed. I felt inspired by how beautiful the line looked, and how green and luscious the surrounding is. I was also intrigued by how difficult and technical the movements on the route felt. I felt like I was in love with the wall. I took my camera up with me and I took a few photos of the route. I know at that moment that it would not have mattered if I did not successfully “sent” it. It felt like a pleasure to be there and a privilege to have the inspiration and tools to paint it. On the same day, I decided to give the climb a good lead go. I linked the first crux from the start. Afterwards, my body did all the work and took me to the top. It took a bit for me to convince myself of my ability along the way, and the feeling of flow was amazing.

I love the feeling of intimacy to the rock faces. That is why I love projecting a route. I love knowing the intricacy of every single hand and foot holds, down to every little crystal on the climb. I love learning each and every body movement that would make or break the climb. Painting a route takes me even closer. First, I have to frame the route in its surroundings with the paintbrush. This allows me to see the route in broad lens. I play close attention to the trees, the scrubs, the boulders, and the little water run that you would not notice otherwise. Then, I zoom in, and as I paint the details, I can see and feel every hand hold and every foot edge. As I shade these features, I imagine my body dancing on the route again. I allow myself to spend time on each little bump on the rock that I can feel it on the fingertips and foot. The more detail I layer on the painting, the more colours and features I see on the rock. It makes me feel so intimidate with the rock that almost takes me to another level of love for climbing.

The feelings of inspiration and love are hard to come by. I live to submerge myself in love. That is why I climb, and that is why I paint.